Enough is ENOUGH....isn't it?

I am, and have consistently been, put up against my job in regards to my family.  It seems that although the two should have a symbiotic relationship, they can't seem to get along.  I feel as if I am a timeshare, and both family and the job have signed up for the same week of vacation.  My job provides for family (duh)...my family is the reason for my job.  So for the past three years (if you include my pregnancy), it's been the ultimate UFC battle royale...FAMILY vs. JOB.  And if I am totally honest with myself, as the mom and employee of both fighters, I get lost in the frenzy. 

It's a juggling act, and just when I think I've found out the way to keep all the balls in motion...I'll drop one.  So it's no surprise that when I become sick (despite the insane amount of extra Vitamin C I take daily to ensure that I'll be healthy forever), it seems like everyone in the world is disappointed in me.  How dare I become sick???  Instead of being able to just crawl under the blankets of my bed and not come out again until I'm healthy, I have to work regardless of the strength of my illness.  My career just can't seem to function without me.  If I do take a day off to heal up, I am constantly receiving phone calls from my job about what needs to be done!  That's not even considered rest.  And, my little girl is only 20 months old...she doesn't seem to grasp the fact that Mommy doesn't feel up to "goin' to a park" today, due to the hacking and wheezing uncontrollably all over everything. 

It's almost as though I only exist to DO for other people.  That makes me on the one hand feel important; on the other, it makes me want to sob hysterically for the world to please just stop and give me an honest-to-goodness day off!  Alas,  this mommy must keep going...although...

There have been a few occassions recently where I just had to shut down the Superwoman Factory.  I took a day off from work and shut off my phone.  If they can't figure it out (like I always must do), then it will just have to wait until I feel up to handling whatever the particular career challenge is.  It's not life and death...it's buying CARS.  I've had to shut myself into my bedroom and let my husband deal with my daughter. What good am I doing her if I'm extremely ill and not even focussed on her needs? 

And you know what?  The world didn't end.  I actually felt better.  I got some rest, and probably mended up a lot faster than I would have if I kept trudging through the work day and mommy duties.  The morale of the story is: sometimes, enough IS enough.  Sometimes you just have to say "no" to everyone but yourself, so that sometime soon, you can be everything to everyone.  :)